Silence...so so loud...

It's peculiar how I can appear strong on the outside, seemingly content, yet inside I'm soft and melancholic.

I try to distract myself with other aspects of my life - the women I'm seeing, the money I'm earning. But if I'm honest, everything I do, I do because of you.

I attempt to stop thinking about you, but it's futile.

The tragic part is that I know where I should be... but at this moment, I'm at a loss for words. I'm utterly confused.

I haven't seen you in a while, but our recent encounter has sparked a flurry of emotions, igniting red, white, and blue wires in my mind and heart.

I have not seen you in a while but seeing you again just triggered some red, white and blue wires in my head and heart.

I once told myself, "Move on, man," but I simply can't... or wait, did I? It doesn't matter now.

The most heartbreaking part is that I want you, but I'm simultaneously terrified of rejection and the potential embarrassment that could follow.

And all these thoughts are bouncing around inside me...

The thoughts are deafening... screaming (if such a word exists)... as if they're amplified by microphones and speakers...

One day, I'll find a way to express my feelings. And if you don't reciprocate my love, someone else will.

__________________________________________________________________________________

KOMMYTILA.